Wish list part 124

Everyone has been asking me what I want for my **** birthday. I used to say "Botox, boobjob, boyfriend, bwhahaha" But now I am over all but one of them which no one in their right mind would get me anyway. In my dreams I would have to say: a new laptop like this Vivianne Tam one by HP, DJ lessons, a pink Nash Met with camper not that I camp or anything just super cute, YSL Muse bag size large, a clean garage, another Mason Pearson hairbrush, a restraining order, Funyuns to be fat free, my Gussie back and to not be argued with for an entire 24 hour period. And national health insurance Amen. I know the last four are pretty much impossible but I have hope and that is about all that keeps me going on my march towards death. Well, that and MY TRIP TO VEGAS IN 2 WEEKS. After that, I do not know. Perhaps I will fall into a pit of dispair which is also known by it's other name: CHRISTMAS. Or not. Actually, why don't you just buy me a drink and maybe a nice card or something

Not shown:beer and ciggy

Now that I can fit my fat ass back into the bad fairy costume I am totally going for it. We went to Washington Blvd for trick or treat and it was a time. People were handing out beers and Jesus balloons, had all kinds of props and firepits, and there must have been a thousand kids running around in some really great costumes. We had to miss the kegger on New Jersey because the Unicorn had had enough but that was OK because one of my stays was really poking me in the side and I had to go potty after all those pumpkin ales

with white gloves

Look at this ladylike yummy I picked up at the Goodwill. Funnily enough, I found a pink one exactly like it last year. I'd wire a big fake Camilla to the handle for my next garden party.

EEEEK

Halloween is totally fun. You can wear cat ears to the grocery and no one calls the police. I try to always wear something that will incorporate a tiara like the time I went as an oil slick with a black vinyl dress and a "Miss Valdez" sash. And then there was the B-52 Kate outfit, tiara gratuitous, that because of my giant hair, I could only ride in a car with a sunroof the entire night. For the Trunk or Treat at my kids school this am, all the other perfect parent decorated not only themselves but the back of their cars as well. Mine was full of recycle, cases of Diet Pepsi and a dog crate so i just wrote in the dirt on the back door "Free Kittens", "Goldfish crackers cause cancer"and "Now available: 24 hour Barney Channel" to scare the parents and wore this BCBG puffer coat and Mudd boots as a Canadian Britney

Perfect for the park, right?

Chanel jacket, Target skull shirt, Seven jeans and Charles David patent heels

Bites the dust

Value City is closing which is really surprising, you would think the discounters would be lovin' this recession thingy. I was at the Lafayette Road one today all was 40-60% off and a 100% mess. These shoes were cute for $12 if you are into that Sketchers skater thing. I have always been ambivalent about VC, the bathrooms are abhorrent and there are very few diamonds to be mined though I did find a Dolce & Gabbana dress at the Elyria Ohio location back in the 90's which was a total score.

Where did these come from?

This is as halloween-ey as I get. Though I am thinking about bringing the Bad Fairy costume out of retirement this year if we trick or treat

wow. I can only say:wow

I cannot think of anything more hideous or ironic at this tote and it can be yours for a mere $80. But hurry!! According the the ad, high demand will limit availability. OMG get on this, like, now

yes! yes! yes!

This is what I am talking about, Indianapolis!!! Totally fucking fierce and original, and out and about on a Tuesday, no less. Honestly, I am in awe

Daaaahling

I picked up this vintage grey mink coat at a sale today and belted it for a more modern look. Actually, I was just fuzzy all over with this Ann Taylor cashmere sweater dress that has an unfortunate Maude-ish matching long cardigan but will be great for traveling and, due to an unfortunate ladder incident, my unwaxed legs

too much utube

I have got to get off of YouTube in the PM, totally keeping me up at night, as i am rediscovering such classics as boom boom boom,venga boys and eurytmics (Beethoven)AND as they have led me to make several self titled compilations including stripper tryout/dragqueen, high school boyfriend fuck you and bad techno yet i love it, none of which are particularly good for me to re-live but there you have it

OOTD

This is just the best dress. When you are fat, it is fat with you and when you are skinny, it enjoys a belt. Who does not want that?

Vintage dress, patent boots Target ($10!!!!! clearance whoo hoo)

Shop O the Day

Usually I avoid stores that sell sweaters with holiday appliques, just on general principal. But, I had an hour to kill and a 20% off coupon so into Stein Mart I went. They bill themsleves as designer clothing below department store prices but, please, DKNY and POLO is not designer in my book. Oh, well, yes, they did have some Juicy Couture knee socks and Ed (gag) Hardy bags, not really enough to qualify. SM ranks right up there with Kohls in terms of general mediocrity, but I found a few interesting things among the dreck. This cool flower petal top caught my attention, it was 49.99 but alas only in M and if Iwere some kind of flower child, which I am not, I'd be snapping up these velvet hippie boots by Diba at 59.99. A big rack of Seven Jeans marked down to 34.99 from 59.99 must be some kind of low rent line, at least I am hoping because I know what I paid for mine and honey, not even close. In conclusion, I am still meh on Stien Mart. But their housewares department tries really hard even if still stuck back in 2003

I'll take two

This amazing diamond is the new Louis Vuitton Lily cut that is exclusive to the brand. No, really, no one else can make this diamond. Can this be any more luxurious? Or is it too marquis? My jury is still out

Or Kim Kardashian

I used to hate anything that made my butt look big. Large pockets, peplums, snowpants; all a mojor no no. So why am I now embracing the tulip tiered skirt thing? Maybe Beyonce http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8mVEGfH4s5g is to blame. Dress by Red Doll

Having a MUCH better day

Feelin' retro-ish. DVF chain print orange jersey dress with high boots and Mabe pearl necklace. LOVE Diane VonFus, in her knit dresses, I can wear anything from a size 4 to a 10 and that really helps out on the clearance rack, as you can imagine

My principals vs. a bargain

I had an opportunity to get a some skinny dark denim jeans by twenty8twelve at a great price ($86 vs $340) but luckily my Sevens reappeared because I hate to support that homewrecker Sienna Miller. You'd think she could get her own fresh man instead of a used one.

Back

Yes, I missed yesterday, my first day since I was in another country, which would be Texas, back in May. I was just not feelin' it. You see, I am under severe shopping restrictions and it is killing my mojo. My spark. My will to live. Seriously. Then I got my teeth literally sandblasted at the dentist and I did not care for that either. What a mess. On the bright side I realized I do indeed have some dark skinny jeans, where these Seven's came from I do not know, and now do not have to buy a pair. And my hair looked kinda good.

Today I went with the ruffle trend on my J Crew tank, Steve Madden shoes and Ball of Cotton cardigan

Don't my pants look backwards?

Feeling kind of snotty today so I wore my heavily logo-ed Chanel sweater and True Religion jeans with the obnoxious stitching

Not the Gymboree one

Bro Rip has a new shopping destination as of yesterday. Crazy 8 Boutique is a hipster consignment shop with lots of jeans and rad jackets. They need tons more merch, but I did get a super wide leg tweed pants and was eyeballing this retro dress featured above. Stop on in they are open until 7

Must be sick

When at Macy's today, I checked out the new BCBGeneration line by BCBG. It has the styling like the original but a lower price point like $98 dresses instead of $450. I found the attention to detail lacking and the fabrics did not seem as nice but still some interesting looks using strategic seams and unusual prints. Otherwise the mall was just a big bust. Not even that hot mess Forever 21 could entice me with anything

For Eileen

I love the word fuck and am notorious for utilizing it to it's fullest potential. Go Texas!

I think you need a new one

I am sorry to say this look was inspired by Avril Levigne in the fall People Magazine style issue. I love that Girlfriend song, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cQ25-glGRzI but I think personally she is a snot.

Go Target dress, Periscope military jacket, Kenzie boots, can you see the cute plaid buttons?

what to do????

Gosh, I am torn. Sisters of Mercy in Cincinnati http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qWvOHT0zfXY&feature=related or biological sisters with no mercy weekend in Vegas. Both have some amazing possibilities. What do you think?

With my giant paw

Ah, fall. Boots, big scarf, dark denim; does this not look perfectly pumpkin patch-ey?

H&M scarf and babydoll sweater, Citizens jeans, Mudd boots

No, that is not the cryptkeeper's hand

Bad: two stupid dogs
Good: saving your cat from death
Bad: being called a tough ass bitch
Good: by medical professionals
Bad: swelling
Good: current on tetanus, ice

bad : Pee and blood soaked

Good: Getting a new rug. Cowhide, perhaps?

But I do not want a real one, anymore

I was wandering on Mod Cloth http://www.modcloth.com/ and saw these awesome peacock tights for $29.99. Would they make my legs look diseased? I do not know but I'm gonna find out. What shoes is truly the dilemma. Target (of course) had some cool ones too, I got a black and grey large houndstooth pair to wear with my distressed cord Free People grey mini. Did you know the guy that owns that company is worth 4.1 billion dollars? And he is married but has no kids? And is not really that cute? Thank you, Forbes

It sucks to be me

Desperation last minute shopping yesterday trying to find either a) tight long high waisted pencil or b) short foofy preferably taffeta skirt and made the mistake of going to Macy's at Glendale. Did not find anything remotely close, what a huge surprise since Glendale sucks, and spent an inordinate amount of time trying to find a mall entrance which I guess you cannot. So I just went to Target which I should have done in the first place, geez, and got a Jonathan Saunders skirt with satin stripe front and black fishnets stocking for my Avenue Q outfit. I'm not sure if this turned out Muppet-ish or just Ab Fab Patsy. And yes, that purse is made of rubber bands. The show, BTW, was pretty good tho' I was hoping a little edgier. Puppet sex: ick but funny. Next time I'll pay attention more to the puppeteers rather then the puppets and I love love the Bad Idea Bears, I am sure I will reference them A LOT in the future

New favorite razzi

When I ask people to take my picture for the blog they always want me to be smiling and all proper and just boring. Not my friend Debbie, she's got props and pose suggestions and we had a blast at her shop, Red Rose Vintage, which HAS NOT closed but is now on College Ave, did you see her on the news this AM?

Some tunic shirt Igot at Frankeys, Spanx shiny leggings, Stuart Weitzman platform booties

Not a human size

Bows are truly cyclical. From the neck of a 50's secretary blouses to the butt of an 80's wedding dress to today's amazing Lanvin collection, they are never ovah. I found this rayon 40's dress in my archives and could not wait to wear it, so sweet with that pink satin bow and trim. Sadly, I got my arms in and that was about it. Drat. It barely fit on the mannequin and it's no secret she is bulimic.

just in time

Sunglasses are getting so big these days, let's just call 'em as we see 'em. Like these Mask Sunglasses $190 by Linda Farrow/Bernhard Wilhelm. If they came in black and I had a bike, ummm Ducati please, I'd be all over them. Until then, maybe for superhero day. I found them on http://www.fatal.com/ which I got from the European design blog : whats-wrong-with-the zoo. I like how the international sites can link you back to a great American site you would have never found on http://www.gofugyourself.com/

So much for the no spending resolution

Today, I took a bunch of stuff I was just sick of to my always raving about, fave ever, consignment shop; Out of the Closet on Westfield Blvd. I always feel weird about consigning, you never get what you think you should but you know what? Face it girl, the money is spent and you're not gonna wear it. EVER AGAIN. Thank God, lots of other people feel this way and I left with an enormous fuzzy collar blue sweater I am going to wear to Avenue Q tomorrow in muppet spirit, a pair of Splendid leggings with super cute button cuffs and some Gucci loafers waaaay too small for me but someone will be thrilled to get

Express banded bow neck top, Wicked Monkey city shorts, Modern Vintage shoes

New shoes!

Sometimes I come across things online and I am just not sure what they are about. I know, I know, Snope it, but this is European stuff. For instance, The Virtual Shoe Museum, I discovered on Whats-Wrong-With-The-Zoo. They look like real shoes, but do they exist? The website is a little hard to navigate and there is this annoying video window right in the middle but you should check it out for inspiration and to use up one of your three wishes. Hey, if Chanel can sell those dumb gun shoes I think there might be a market for those cat things. I'd buy'em, that's for sure

Gotta fix that fence

This is my dog defender outfit. Yes, in those shoes. Just add a croquet mallet and 2 nasty chowchows. I was like an angry Sporty Barbie or a deranged Zelda on the West Lawn, I think that last part is redundant. I don't see how anyone can even like those kinds of dogs. With those beady eyes and matted fur, they must trick humans into servitude by being awful cute as puppies. Stay outta my yard!
Burning Torch shirt, Go Target shorts, Steve Madden ruffle shoes

With dark denim only

I know a lot of guys want to be fashionable but don't know where to start. I suggest at the bottom, with an interesting pair of shoes. I am seeing a lot men's shoes with a very long and narrow squared off toe, sort of cowboy boot-ish but in a slip on. Cool but extreme. The $334 boots by Chronicles of Never would be a nice subtle choice. Not weird enough to cause staring by the general public and totally functional. However, anyone who cares about fashion details will notice your amazing, elegant taste

Molting

Digging in my attic archive I found this skirt that mimics that feather look I like so much. I did leave a trail of tiny leather discs everywhere I went today and I can't imagine that a garment made of actual feathers would fare much better

There but for the grace of God go I

Kate, what are you thinking! That is not a starter fur! Rabbit or sheared mink ONLY before 10!

Yellow station wagon

Feeling kind of 50's domestic today, I made cupcakes, moped the floor and changed the sheets all before 10 am. Then I took a Valium and screwed the pool boy. Kidding! I don't have a pool.

H&M mum shirt, AG jeans, J Crew ballet flats, J Crew head scarf I will never wear again

House of Fifth

The House of Fifth went all out with their fashion launch last night at Forty Five Ten. A red carpet complete with screaming paparazzi and 2 sappy ET like interviewers ushered you in to the Saarinen airport like space. The crowd was decidedly local but I saw nice tries like this bustier over neon cut out shirt, legwarmers pulled down over heels and some weird thermal undershirt with all these military pins and patches. I wish I had more information about this line before I saw it, knowing the philosophy and focus of the company as well as price points would help this reviewer, but HOF seems to prefer the secret spy approach. Lots of screen print soft slouchy tees, long enough to be worn as dresses, sorta. Cute but not special. Obviously the jeans were not their line but was the jewelry? I really liked the polo shirts with the side skewed collars and stripes. I wasn't sure if the underwear presentation was just gratuitous, not much innovation there, and I applaud those brave brave girls bouncing down the runway. Some nice suit/dress looks in a military style with lots of buttons. Some advice? Tell us where we can buy it!!!!

Talbot street for the Avenue Q party. Never been there and I am in lurve. Bangin' techno, drag queens and a big old stage right in the middle you can dance on. I tell you, if I had a pansy posse I'd be there every night.

Oh me? Thomas Wylde top, Target skirt, false eyelashes, vintage beaded clutch

Dude, your pants are on fire

I once found a plastic trashcan that had been set on fire, full of trash, bonus, and it had melted into the most intriguing shape. I took it home, fluffed it up and entered it in a big art contest, you know, just for fun. Well, it did not win but did get a mention, though unflattering, in the local paper. These chairs from Mooi sort of validate what I found attractive in that smoking relic