Touche shredder

Oh haha, so much for making fun of apparel office accidents. I was reminded that I recently had my own clothing industrial mishap, so I guess neckware in a shredder is not much of a leap. I was working on a lobby decor project for an office (don't ask where it is because the owner totally ruined it by adding a bunch of additional and supremely ugly furniture to my cool and well balanced space) and the skirt of my dress was actually ripped off by an industrial fan. That in itself is pretty hilarious, though death defying, I know, and the aftermath of only having large paper clips to hold it together AND having to pick the children up from school in this get up, even more so. I was clanking like I was armed

Blouse love

I found this great late 1970's poly shirt at the Goodwill and I don't know why I had to think twice about it. The drapey top looks like a necklace and the puff sleeves are just cute. I wore it with my nylon baggy short shorts and my weird but good Modern Vintage heels. I almost threw on some ankle socks but thought better of it. Maybe with a pencil or tulip skirt that would look ok, shorts not so much

I love my shredder

So, I noticed this on my new favorite thing today and about peed my pants laughing. Now THAT, I would like to see. I apologized in advance if this has happened to someone in your family, but if you get your tie caught in a shredder, you deserve die

Yes, i said fifty dollars. And up.

Even thought it's summer, sometimes you get lonely for your denim. Yes, I know this is a reissue of the Melody Inn outfit from May but I paid alot for this tank top so I'm gonna wear it. I used to just hate jeans. Well, of course not in the 80's when my stonewashed butt was Electric Sliding at Hooligans every happy hour, but sometime after college I just stopped wearing them. Too uncomfortable, too unflattering, too whiskered. But now thanks to the wonders of spandex I am back like I have never left. OK, going to take them off because I just went outside and it is like 400 degrees out there.

Can I just say there should be a law that a stores that sell $50 and up children's shoes must have a public potty, I mean bathroom. Sheesh. Thanks Pita Pit!

Heffa

We went to the Canal yesterday and while I was cool and comfy, I was also clearly pregnant. Or so it would appear. And it really makes me mad because this dress has belt loops so it should have come with some sort of sash, which I did not receive. And can I tell you all, there is nothing, I mean , nothing, worst to wear when you are paddle boatin' then a big old maternity style dress. I am just saying: I was Britney-ing all over the unsuspecting pedestrians and it was not fun.

Diet tips

The best halloween costume my mom ever made for us was my sister's hot dog outfit. This photo is NOT what it looked like, nor is it my sister. But anyway I was thinking about it today because I was watching this at the gym and nearly threw up . http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KvudKRzHQsQ Looking to lose some weight? Try aversian therapy! I don't eat hot dogs anyway, unless they are from Netty's, but now I thinking about crossing anything sausagey off that list too. Just gross

July 4th y'all

When I was in grade school, I would only wear was red, white and blue. No necessarily together of course but that was it in the color spectrum of my clothes. This carried over to decor when I got to pick out my own wallpaper and choose this hideously fantastic giant cartoon floral that must have given my east coast DAR mother the fits. So Murakami!! It was pretty embarrassing seeing this in college but now 20 years later I can see how it was superbad. I could truly sell a roll of that stuff for at least $50 on eBay. This is an awkward segue way into my not red or white, 4th of July outfit. Can you tell I'm totally wearing my retainer? Well, it's not really a retainer, more of a mouth guard slash unintentional puffy lip maker, which is an interesting new look but I am glad I can undo it by taking it out. Yes, I am still hangin' on to those Juicy Couture terry capris but in my defense have indeed ditched all the 2003 sweatsuits, velour and terry both. H&M embroidered top, not really my normal style, a little blouse-y but good for sitting on the porch reading People magazine and drinking too many diet Pepsis. Kid is in rumba Petit Tresor, pre-mud puddle